In a Glass, Darkly

I’m learning to do a number of things. I am learning to plan the plot of a novel. I am learning that if you don’t stick to the plan you can find yourself at the end of the story before you have told the beginning and middle, or even the bulk of the end, in sufficient detail.

I am learning that setting, and keeping daily goals are the key to achieving long term goals. I have also figured out that a time based goal may serve my purpose better than a word count based goal. For example, I can decide to write for an hour each morning instead of writing a minimum of a thousand words a day. I will keep up the word count based goal until the end of the month in order to meet the fifty thousand words in thirty days challenge of NaNoWriMo however.

I have learned that in order to accomplish things you have to do something first. It sounds trivial but it’s true. I’ve also learned that just because you do something doesn’t necessarily mean that you will accomplish anything. It’s one of those “necessary but not sufficient” type of constraints.

In the final analysis, it turns out that writing a good, entertaining, exciting, grammatically correct, coherent, story is inherently difficult. You have to combine a lot of skills. You have to give it lots of thought. You have to show up and write every day. You have to finish a draft, and then another, and yet another, until eventually you get it right.

If you give up before you finish, you will fail. If your idea is not as good as you initially thought it was, you may fail. But if you don’t sit down and write every day until you’ve written it, you will certainly fail. As unfair as it seems, sometimes just showing up every day is the bulk of the effort.

It’s not down to talent, luck, or connections. It is persistence, pure and simple. Talent, luck, and connection can help, but again, they are not sufficient alone.

These realizations ought to depress me but they are having the opposite effect. I am actually more encouraged after writing this blog post than I was when I sat down. I have written a coherent essay, off the top of my head, without having composed it before hand. I have proof read it and discovered only minor usage edits. And now I post it.

Sweet dreams, don’t forget to tell the ones you love that you love them, and most important of all, be kind.

The Struggles of a Fledgeling Writer

Once again, the importance of planning is arising in the execution of a project. My first novel, The Gentry, was drafted in 2014. It has sat, unedited for two years. I had planned much of the character details for several years before I actually sat down to write. It was not, however, well plotted. Now, there is much to do in order to attempt to salvage it.

The novel I’m drafting this month is beginning to show signs of some of the same shortcomings. I have not done enough planning and what planning I did hasn’t all been reflected in what I’ve actually written so far. The technique that I chose to get past the block that I found myself struggling with yesterday was to punt and write about something that happened before the point at which I initially started this novel.

I didn’t particularly like the way I began this novel anyway. Having some more scenes from that period in the timeline of the story will let me play with exactly how I intend to start the story.

In much the same way, I will write other fragments of the story tomorrow morning and see if by so doing I can pull a full blown novel out of my hat again this year.

The more times that I get to the end of the fifty thousand word challenge, whether I have actually finished a draft of a novel or not, the more I will have learned about what I have done right, what I’ve done wrong, and what I need to adjust when I write again.

And I will continue to write. Because the fact is, I’ve become engaged by it. It is something that I want to get better at. It is something that I am willing to work hard to become better at. It is something that I must do. That is the only excuse for art that counts. You write, or draw, or compose music, or whatever it is that your muse bids you do, because you can not help doing it.

One of my mother’s favorite stories was about a famous actress who had come to the university where she went to school on a speaking tour. The actress had spoken and done dramatic readings and otherwise entertained the audience for about an hour or so. At the end of her performance she asked if anyone in the audience would like to ask a question.

One student stood up and asked her, “Should I become an actress?” She stopped for a dramatic pause and then answered her, “No, my dear, you should not. You should be a lawyer or a scientist or a mathematician. You should be anything but an actress. You should only be an actress if you absolutely can not be anything else.”

Sweet dreams, don’t forget to tell the ones you love that you love them, and most important of all, be kind.

Half Way Through NaNoWriMo

It’s November fifteenth. The middle of National Novel Writing Month. I have written over twenty six thousand words. I am on track to write fifty thousand words this month. The problem? I don’t think this story has fifty thousand words in it. I’m not even sure that it has the twenty six thousand that I’ve already written. In short, it needs a lot of rework.

I know. I have said before on this blog that my job during NaNoWriMo is to write a draft, not a finished novel. The thing is, I think I have written myself into a corner. I have missed important plot points in my exposition so far and I have ended up rather far from the destination that I planned.

I am not proposing to ditch what I’ve already written. I just need to figure out how to get back on track. Perhaps I can find a point from which to pick up the thread and write an alternate story. The point of NaNoWriMo isn’t just to write fifty thousand words, especially if you have “won” once already. It is to have the discipline to make daily progress on a writing project and learn something new about the craft of writing while so doing.

That said, I’m stumped. I don’t know where to pick up the thread in my novel. I also have an early meeting tomorrow so I’m going to have to postpone my writing session to the evening instead of my usual first thing in the morning. Tomorrow promises to be a challenging day.

Sweet dreams, don’t forget to tell the ones you love that you love them, and most important of all, be kind.

Another Piece of Humble Pie, Please

My wife told me that I don’t listen. I believe her. I work at listening but I usually discover that I have fallen far short of having heard what was said. There are several reasons for this. I’m going to list the reasons I can think of in order to help me remember them and avoid them in the future.

  1. We only hear what we want to hear. We ignore the things that we don’t want to hear and the things that we do want to hear stand out. We remember the things that we do want to hear. We forget those that we don’t want to hear.
  2. We are just waiting for our turn to talk. This is a common one. It is prevalent among people that think they know more about a subject than others do. We wait until the other person shuts up so that we can enlighten them with our superior knowledge.
  3. We interrupt people before they finish. This is a symptom of not paying close attention to what the other person is actually saying. Since we have no clue what they are getting at, it is no surprise that we have a hard time knowing when they are finished trying to get it through our thick head.
  4. We get distracted when someone is trying to tell us something. We aren’t interested in what they have to say or, we are more interested in something else that captures our attention than we are in what they are trying to say to us.
  5. We only listen to people whose opinions we agree with. This results in the so called “echo chamber” effect that most of us first encountered this election season. This mistake is probably responsible for the outcome of the recent presidential election.

We’ve got to start listening to what everybody has to say, with respect. It is the only way to mend the divide in this country. We really are stronger together. Fear is a killer. It causes unnecessary stress. It eats away at the good things in life and leaves behind a rotting corpse.

Love really is the answer, no matter what the question. Love and respect. We don’t conquer our enemies by adopting their heinous practices. We win their hearts and minds by listening to what they have to say with respect. We don’t have to agree with them, just acknowledge their right to have their say.

Sweet dreams, don’t forget to tell the ones you love that you love them, and most important of all, be kind.

Why I Like Apple Computers

So, one of our new MacBook Pro laptops has been shipped. I expect the other one to ship any day now. This is ahead of the schedule that they promised. I am very excited. I haven’t had a mac of my own for two years. I think it is going to be an outstanding product and I will enjoy using it for many years.

There are many people that have criticized the latest model. They have maintained that reducing the number and types of peripheral connectors is a flaw instead of a feature. I disagree.

One of the primary reasons that I choose Apple hardware is that they have developed a well earned reputation for building high quality hardware and standing behind it. The hardware and operating system software have been made specifically for each other and consequently are tuned for optimal performance.

I am a computer professional. I write software for a living. I am also a writer. I want a computer that I can depend upon and one that works without a lot of attention to maintenance. In other words, I want my computer to be a dependable appliance. The Apple computer is engineered to allow me to do my work with minimal distractions.

Getting back to the number and type of connectors on the latest MacBook Pro, I see it as a bold engineering decision designed to increase the reliability and usability of the machine. It is a well known principle of engineering that if you can achieve your purpose using identical interfaces you build in redundancy such that if one interface fails, another can fill in for it. You also reduce the number of different kinds of cables that you have to keep around.

It will take the industry a while to catch up with Apple, but in this case I am certain that they have backed another winning technology with USB-C, the peripheral connector technology that provides both the power and all other connections to the new MacBook Pro.

Sweet dreams, don’t forget to tell the ones you love that you love them, and most important of all, be kind.

Thanks to My Music Teachers

It is important to remember our life, otherwise it lacks meaning. There are people that have a profound influence upon us. They help shape the people that we will become. Tonight I have been remembering the people that participated in my music education.

My music education began in third grade. That would have been in 1963-1964. Mr. Mansfield and Mr. Burt came to our school and administered a hearing acuity test. Those that scored highly were asked if they would like to participate in the Paducah City Schools string program and I was one of them. They gave us a flyer to take home to discuss with our parents whether we wanted to participate in the program or not.

I remember forgetting about it until the last moment. My dad made a heroic effort to rent a student violin so that I could participate. From the third grade through the sixth grade Mr. Mansfield and Mr. Burt taught string class for an hour after school, two days a week. We were supposed to practice every day between classes but I rarely did.

Then in seventh grade, I started Junior High School at Brazelton. I took string class every day. Mr. Mansfield was the teacher. He was very patient with me. I still didn’t practice much at home but since we played every day in class, I got better quickly. I got Mononucleosis that year and was out of school for three months. String class was one of the few classes that I passed that year.

I changed school systems the next year. I went to Lone Oak Upper Elementary in the eighth grade. They had a band but no string program. I missed string class a lot.

My freshman year at Lone Oak High School, I took A Capella Choir. Mr. Murphy was a great teacher. I learned a lot about music, performing, and competing from him. We did well in the regional choir competition.

My Sophomore year at Lone Oak High School, I took A Capella Choir again but my folks bought me a trombone and I added laboratory band and music theory to my curriculum. Mr. Ransdell taught the band class and music theory. Laboratory band was the class where you learned to play an instrument if you had gotten a late start. Since my string skills didn’t count for much, I was stuck there learning how to play. I had fun anyway. I loved hanging out with the band members.

We moved to Murphysboro, Illinois the next year. I didn’t take music my junior or senior year in high school. By that time I was a fairly good guitar player and I occasionally played violin. I have continued playing music to this day. I have learned to play mandolin, ukulele, and Celtic harp. I also can play a little bit of keyboards.

Mr. Mansfield, Mr. Burt, Mr. Murphy, and Mr. Ransdell have my eternal thanks for teaching me music. It has been an important part of my life and has helped me deal with the stress and challenges of adult life.

Sweet dreams, don’t forget to tell the ones you love that you love them, and most important of all, be kind.

Distilled for Your Pleasure

At first we were wisps of dust, floating on the nothingness that was the primordial stuff from which galaxies are formed. Each one alone. Each one unaware that there were others like them.

Then there were clumps, as mote stuck to mote and clump stuck to clump. The clumps attracted one another until they comprised a minor portion of the mass of the system. They got denser and denser until eventually, the huge mass at the heart of the system ignited and became a new star.

We entities of energy let our lights shine so that the universe will know the difference between the random and the intentional. We split the darkness in two. It is clear where light ends and darkness begins.

We speak in metaphor because our heart is broken. You cannot look into the heart of a star without it ultimately consuming you. Some things are worth being consumed for, others aren’t. May I have the means and the will to be a beacon in the darkness, a child of the light.

I practice the art of the poet. I make my words evocative while remaining ambiguous so that people reading them can map them onto their particular situation. Thus the general becomes the specific and the hack becomes the bard.

There is no need for moon or June or tune. The bridges across the creeks and streams in the back roads of the county each have their own vocabulary of emotions that paint the hearts of the reader.

As long as there are wild places where nature can assert her primacy, the wilderness thrives. It is only when people are stacked like cord wood that the passions of the masses boil over in a bloody mess.

When in the course of electoral madness, the will of the people is subjugated to that of a disproportionaly sized collection of privileged people there is almost inevitably a reaction.

None of which actually matters because it has all precipitated the next morning like the dew on the morning flowers.

Sweet dreams, don’t forget to tell the ones you love that you love them, and most important of all, be kind.

Ramblings on Writing

It’s hard work making up stories. Even when you know where you are going with something, deciding all the details of how events unfold can be daunting. Sometimes, things don’t unfold the way you intended. You become tempted to stop and go back and rewrite.

That way lies madness. You have to steel your courage and press on. You will address the deviations from plans later AFTER you have completed a first draft. I have wallowed in the self indulgent squalor of rewriting the first chapter again and again and never finishing the story. Best to put the story so far, such as it is, behind you and press on toward the end of this draft.

This is the essential lesson of the writer. Write. Finish a draft. Give yourself some distance from the draft. Then, read your draft with a critical eye. Sleep on it. Read it again and take notes on what you are reading. Note inconsistencies and week points in your manuscript.

And, for heaven’s sake, before you start editing, save your first draft in several pages intact. If you mess up editing, you want to be able to start over with your raw first draft. One of my tricks is I put my manuscript in a source code control system, Git is my tool of choice. Then, when you totally mess up the edit of chapter two, you can go back and revert to a previous version and try again.

Sweet dreams, don’t forget to tell the ones you love that you love them, and most important of all, be kind.

My Own Private Miracle

I am losing weight. My blood pressure is dropping to the normal range and even lower at times, due to my blood pressure meds. (Note: I see my doctor for my semi-annual checkup in a few weeks and in the mean time I am sending her logs of my blood pressure readings every week.  If it dips dangerously low, I will call her immediately.) My fasting blood sugar is below 100 every morning, something that hasn’t happened in years.

Why is all of this happening? I only have my own personal experience as evidence but I think it is because I am following Dr. Joel Fuhrman‘s Eat to Live lifestyle. I’ve been eating according to his recommendations for a little over a month and I’ve lost over twenty five pounds so far, in addition to the lowered blood pressure and blood sugar. My cholesterol is 140 and my LDL is 98. Strong evidence.

How did I happen upon this wonderful book? Another wonderful, and very funny book, Penn Jillette’s (of Penn&Teller fame) book Presto!: How I Made 100 Pounds Disappear and Other Magical Tales. In it, he tells about his own moment of truth where he decides he has to change how he is living if he wants to live. His blood pressure was dangerously high and his doctor was suggestion he have surgical weight loss intervention (a lap band).

As I read the book, it started making sense. He had a personal coach, Ray Cronise, that helped him through his phenomenal weight loss odyssey. But toward the end of the book he mention Dr. Fuhrman’s recipes and books. He even called his dietary lifestyle Nutritarian, a term coined by Dr. Fuhrman. When I looked for publications by Ray Cronise, I didn’t find any.

Eat to Live is a great book. It is well written and heavily referenced to the medical literature. In places where he believes that studies were flawed he explains exactly what data they neglected to collect an sites other studies that collected that data and refuted the flawed studies when they exist. In short, while he makes some remarkable claims, he has evidence and a functional model of human nutrition to back it up.

I know, I sound like an evangelical preacher. I also know that some people may not choose to eat this way. I am not judging how anyone else chooses to live their life. I am just thankful that I am finally starting to lose a significant amount of this excess weight that was killing me and making me tired all of the time.

I expect to keep dropping weight until I reach my target. Then I’ll adjust my diet slightly to maintain that weight and still eat a nutrient rich, plant centric diet. Spoiler alert – Dr. Fuhrman recommends you eat mostly leafy green vegetables, raw vegetables, and fruits. He discourages eating much if any animal products such as meat or dairy. He emphasizes low salt, low oil, and low sugar. He also suggests avoiding highly processed, nutrient poor foods such as white flour, white rice, etc.

I eat all I want, I’m not hungry, and I’m losing about a pound a day. I’ll update you on my progress in a future blog post.

Don’t take my word for it. If you’re interested, read the book, Eat to Live, and give his plan a try for six weeks. I believe you may find a solution to weight loss and healthy living that you can live with.

Sweet dreams, don’t forget to tell the ones you love that you love them, and most important of all, be kind.

An Olive Branch Offered Before the Returns are In

Today, me, Pam, and the dogs went to vote. I told several people at the polls that we were educating the girls about democracy. Everyone seemed to think it was funny.

I am so glad the election is over today. We won’t know who won until later but at least we’ve got this horrible campaign behind us. It has ruined so many friendships and caused so much heartache. Maybe now we can begin the processes of rebuilding our society and find some long term solutions to the flaws in our election system.

I know I’m being naive. There is too much money involved in keeping the system the way it has been to expect any quick fixes. I have heard some good ideas though. Maybe if enough of us got behind them we could start a dialog and get some of the archaic misfeatures of our system changed.

One important change would be to either hold the election on a weekend or declare election day a national holiday. Then people wouldn’t have to take time off without pay to vote. The current election day was selected to cater  to voters that had to spend a day traveling to their polling place.

Another change that I’d like to see is to change the rules so that if somehow two candidates got on the ballot that you absolutely hated, there would be a “None of the above” selection. If “None of the above” got the majority of votes, the election would be automatically rerun and none of the candidates from the first election would be allowed to run in the new election.

The most glaring flaw in the system is the electoral college. It might have made sense in the eighteenth century but it makes no sense at all in a modern democracy. We need to change the system so that the president is elected by straight popular vote. If necessary, we need to amend the constitution of the United States to do so.

Of course the major parties will fight this tooth and nail because they have used the system to their advantage numerous times in the past. But they answer to us in the long run. All we have to do is keep voting people out of office until we get people in that will listen to the will of the people.

There are other possible improvements to the system but these changes would go a long way to making the system more to my liking.

We could also nominate candidates that treated each other like civilized adults instead of junior high school bullies but that might be asking too much.

It’s good to have this election behind us. Let’s be kind to each other no matter who wins today.

Sweet dreams, don’t forget to tell the ones you love that you love them, and most important of all, be kind.